*Open* Painting the Afternooon Away

[Willow Joanne Esquire]

Willow was allowed out of the hospital wing now. The bandages were still wrapped tightly around the self-inflicted wounds...but that was mostly there just so that she would not do anything further to the healing tissue... and so that those around her may not freak out too much. She got a long lecture, and a brief bark of some orders that she'll have to check in with them often...or was it with her doctor-therapist person? One of the two. Or perhaps both? They'll remind her if it's truly nessesary.

Do you need some help, or you got it?Lily's soft voice echoed next to her. Her sister.... her lovely sister... she was there with her the whole time she was in the hospital. She knew she managed to get Lily worried sick...but... Christine's words simply have upset her... deeply. The blind yound woman churned to the diraction of the voice, and smiled slightly, shaking her head. She managed. Lily was counting the steps...adn the wall was helping to guide her. Though, to be quite truthfull, walking down these halls again after couple of weeks.. or was it a week? She didn't know... was rather odd again. After all, she was practically tied to the bed there.

It was a long walk, mostly due to the fact that she managed to get churned around and was in teh wrong diraction.. though that was quickly fixed, yet it allowed her time to think. The same thoughts that haunted her in teh HW...were still casting their shadows even today. Though now guilt set in too. She was avoiding everyone she knew.... then again, perhaps they have been avoiding her as well.... It was hard to tell at this point of time. But she felt guilty. Guilty of even trying to kill herself... guilty of allowing words to get to her... guilty of not concidering anyone around her. But, at the time, those thoughts simply did not exist.

AHA! I have found it! Willow cheered, giving Lily a high-five as they found the rec room. They decided that it would be a nice place to just... hang out. Relax, per say. Just... relax and enjoy one self in a neutral environment... Where no one bad should get her. Nothing scary cuold happen... where she would be safe.... perhaps not fully, but at least in the atmosphere it was difficult to keep track of one's thoughts, and that was exactly what she wanted and needed. Lily could use a break too... talk to some people, maybe play a game or two... or watch the TV.

Carefully Willow made her way to the couch, before curling up in the corner of it, after a few apoligies when bumping into people. IT was inevidable. Her fingers began to play with the hem of her shirt. She tried to play with the bandages but the passing nurse? at least she figured it was a nurse, stopped her. With a heavy sigh, Willow moved her head around listening to things going on around her. People watching Tv. People playing some board games. People just talking about.... odd things. Somewhere in teh corner music was playing. There was some people painting.... She was able to do that...

Pushing all her thoughts aside, she moved forth to the painting area... It was not a smooth journey, especially since Lily wasn't helping. She managed to count each table, chair, person, and some other hard surface that was on the way. She even said hello to some art-stand. The owner of it wasn't happy. At all.

"Can't you see where you're going? You stupid cow! I'm painting here!"

I"m sorry... I'll... be more carefull next time.. She mumbled dropping her head as a Nurse caught her and lead her away from the still raging man, with some other nurse moving to calm the man down... He... didn't like that, his escalating shouts causing Willow to flinch.

"Shhh.. it's alright... nothing to worry about..." The nurse pettted her hand reasuringly, as the man's shouts ceased. Sedated perhaps? Willow nodded. "Now dear... would you like to draw something? Perhaps sculpt? Do some paper mache?"

"Paint....I...want to paint... Willow whispered quietly, and only a few minutes later, she was at the canvas, her fingers tracing paterns upon the rough surface. She was imagining teh lines that she traced upon the canvas. The colors that could be there. The images sthat the lines could form. Before her the painting was taking place, unfolding before her vision, in the darkness that was otherwise surrounded her.

Flowers here... some swirls there... perhaps some leaves and a touch of the sun... no dout this is nothing as I see it... The woman mumbled with a soft chuckle as she continued to paint, making a mental note to ask the nurse to describe how this thing actually churns out. It should be amuzing enough!

[Alec J. Anderson]

Alec had nothing to say to anyone. In fact, it was best if they just left him alone in general. The past three days he’d spent in solitary confinement had been worse then hell. His shoulders ached from the straight jacket that had restrained him for the past seventy-two hours. Of course they’d been required to let him out of it periodically but the time was never really enough for his limbs to loosen up. The guard standing next to him in the hallway shook his head as Alec rolled his newly freed shoulders. ‘You know, this kind of stuff wouldn’t happen if you stopped picking fights with everyone.’

“Are you trying to start one?”

Alec literally growled at the guard. It was someone new, which didn’t surprise him. Pushing his arms forward, he let out a slight yawn as he stretched uncomfortably. He let out another sigh before touching his fingers at the dry cut on his forehead. The fight had been one hell of a battle before security quickly stepped in and broke it up. To be honest Alec couldn’t even remember what was said, only that it had rubbed him the wrong way. But everything was doing that to him lately, setting him off like a ticking time bomb. Except there wasn’t much of a reset button, because after every explosion he was immediately at the end of his rope again. ‘You want to go to the recreational room Alec?’

“No.”

Lie. Of course he did. He wanted to try to find Sid and Willow, apologize to them for not being around as much the past few days. But by now surely his friends were used to his antics of disappearing in SC. Alec was always in trouble and by default stayed in solitary confinement almost as much as he did in his room. Any day now he expected them to not even let him out to see other patients. A part of him almost wished they would. Shifting on his feet, he started walking down the hallway towards the rec room. Glancing back at the guard as he did so. Of course the man scrambled to catch up with him, but luckily knew better and gave Alec his space.

When they entered the recreational room, the first thing he did was glance around the room for Sid or Willow. Come to think of it, before he’d gotten put into SC it had been a while since he’d seen Willow around. Almost immediately he noticed her in the back corner, painting away at something. Knowing her she’d have some elaborate idea of what it looked like. Knowing him he’d just stand back and agree with her if she asked. The next thing he did was scan the rest of the room for any sign of Jeremiah or anyone else that would effortlessly piss him off. Regardless of what most of the staff seemed to think, Alec didn’t actually enjoy SC.

Content that there was no one to really worry about, he made his away over to Willow. As he neared her, he thought of what he would say. Conversations didn’t work well for him, he just couldn’t seem to figure out what he was supposed to say. And He knew the silence probably irked his friends more then anything. Friends… it was such an odd complex thing to wrap his head around. Yes, Sid and Willow were his friends. They were his only friends…or rather the closest thing he had to a friend. Once he was close enough to speak, he found the words locked in his throat. Hazel eyes dropped to the bandage around his friends wrist. Eyes widened, then narrowed hardly. Body clenched tightly together as if bracing for some sort of impact, his next words coming out nothing short of a harsh command.

“What did you do.”

TAGGED Willow
WORD COUNT 643
NOTES hope its okay!
LYRIC CREDIT 30 seconds to mars
IMAGE CREDIT creatingpulsars @ caution 2.0 and BRIT @ LM

[Willow Joanne Esquire]

It took but a minute for Willow to be lost in teh painting. She always loved it. Ever since she was a little girl. It was something her mother, Lily and she did together. Sometimes they would end up spending the whole day together, skipping school in the morning, staing in the living room, painting the whole day away.... Laughing and giggling as some tracks played in the background, perhaps tv... her sisters sometimes joined them... though the rest of her family seemed more like the dad- active and sporty. Willow and Lily, ended up the artistic ones. They even looked like their mother... By the end of the day, they would end up covered in paint, on a sugar high, and exhausted, but quite content, happy at a day well spent.

Small smile came to Willow's lips, as her fingers continued to move over the canvas. It was no doubt going to come out a mess, but she didn't care... it was about the feeling that she had... the bright pleasant memories.... the sence of serenity and peace that she drifted into away from teh rediculous nature of this place. Her memories skipped to what Lily and her did to their room.... their father was not happy when he whent in one morning and found that all of the walls in tehir room were covered in such different, bright murals that covered the entire surface... they even had something on tehir scilling! The dad was not happy, but their mother made cookies... and everything was good again.... they barely changed the murals since their mom died.

The deeper she drifted into their thoughts the happier she got... a sweet escape from the depression that seemed to be hitting her harder... from the pain and the tingling that she still felt from her suicide attempt... from teh fear and the hurt from her family... from teh inability to cope with everything. There, in the far, long gone past, everything was well. Everyone was alive... the sun was shining... and colors existed. She started to hum a tune that her mother used to sing to her and Lily as a laluby. Such pleasant days.... such lovely times....

She paused, giggling slightly, as she imagined what the canvas should look like. No doubt it would look too much like half of the arts done by the modern painters. Yet, on the bright side, at least it could mean that she'd be able to sell it for thousands of dollars! ... perhaps she would be able to start a nice little business...selling her paintings... get a quork for htem... become rich... and once she's out of here.... live in a nice little house somewhere in the city.... Perhaps with a little garden or near a nice little par......

Nothing! I swear! Willow jumped spinning toward the voice raising her arms, her eyes wide with surpirise... it took her only moments to come back from the little fantasy world, and realize who it was near her. Her fingers curled together as she tried to cover the bandages that stood out quite nicely against both of her wrists.... her neck...the paint making all the more visible. Her head dropped, as she despirately wished to have sleeves.

This was the moment she dreaded. This was the words she feared. She had not spoken to either Sid nor Alec, while in the hospital. Maybe she did with Sid... but she could scaresely remember. Alec... no.. he was too protective... he was caught up in his own matters.... no, not like a bad thing, not at all... truth be told she was happy he was. He wouldn't see her hooked up to all the machines, practically crying non stop, and beggin the nurses to leave her be.

I.... I'm sorry... I'm soo sorry.. Her voice was a bare whisper, as she spoke. Soft... shaky... afraid... ashamed... she did not want him to find out. She didn't want either of her Knights to find out. She didn't want them to be hurt...or worried. Looks like that plan, whent well..

[Alec J. Anderson]

He could feel his personal guards eyes narrowing in on him and Alec forced his body language to relax. Unfortunately, he couldn’t wipe the scowling look from his features as he caught sight of yet another bandage on her neck. He found himself rapidly clenching and unclenching his fists as he stared at her; waiting for whatever explanation she would give him. At her ‘nothing! I swear’ he only scowled more. Alec watched, highly un-amused, as she tried to cover the bandages. He said nothing, wave after wave of intensity rolling from his posture. As angry as he was, she wouldn’t need to be able to see him to feel it. The former pain he’d felt in his shoulders and arms felt numb to him now, his body wrought with tension. Even as she spoke, he could do nothing to pull his mind from his memories. ‘I….I’m sorry…I’m soo sorry..’


“Caroline I’m home,” Alec walked into the door with a handful of flowers. He disabled the newly installed alarm as he quickly shuffled into the small apartment, kicking the door shut and locking it as he tried not to drop the water and flower filled vase. “Hey Liney, I was thinking we should go out tonight. You know, go out to dinner and maybe catch a movie.” Alec carefully sat the vase down on the counter and took off his jacket, hanging it over the back of one of the kitchen chairs. He was used to having one-sided conversations with Caroline, her depression kept her from speaking most of the time so he didn’t think much of it. Picking the vase back up, he turned and headed for their bedroom. “Caroline, I know you probably don’t want to. And if you really don’t want to we don’t have to, but I think it’ll be good for you to get out. Jenny called, she says she misses you.” Pushing open the bedroom door with his foot, he entered into the dark room and flipped on the light switch. Immediately the glass vase in his hands fell to the floor and shattered. His heart slammed into his chest as he rushed to the side of the bed and placed his hand on Caroline’s cold cheek. Mind reeled, there was blood everywhere and his first thought was that those men had found them. But as he looked, he realized the blood was from her own wrists. It blanketed their bed in a crimson shade, encompassing her. “CAROLINE.” Even as he checked for a pulse he knew there wouldn’t be one, her body was cold and had turned a pale shade. A note next to him on the floor caught his attention and he reached for it, reading the words ‘I’m so sorry’ over and over again as if they didn’t make sense. Then suddenly, everything crashed. Alec leaned his head against hers, rubbing her hair with his hand as he continued to repeat, “Its okay Caroline. Its okay. Don’t worry. I’m going to take care of everything.”

“Your sorry…?”

His voice maintained the harsh edge it had held in his last command. Alec looked at her, the anger seething from him. Did she know what she’d done? Did she have any clue as to the anguish and mental torture she had wrought on her friends? His breathing increased and he closed his fists, allowing his fingertips to dig into the palms of his hand. Did Sid know about this? Why did she do it to begin with? So many questions plagued him but the only thing he wanted to do was reach out and place his hands around her neck, to save her the trouble from trying to do something like this again. Even know though, he kept the urge down somehow, holding back from full out screaming at her.

“Nowhere near sorry enough. You’re an idiot Willow. How stupid do you have to be? Didn’t you think of Sid at all? Of your family? Your friends?! Don’t you think we’ve all been through enough? Dammit Willow, what is wrong with you? I CAN’T PROTECT YOU FROM YOUR FUCKING SELF!”

Alec shifted away from her and shoved one of the art stands down, knocking over one of the patients and spilling pain everywhere as he did so. Almost instantly his guard was on him, grabbing his arms and twisting them behind his back. Warning him to calm down or he’d be straight back in solitary confinement again. Yanking himself from the guard, he walked across the room and glared out of one of the bared windows, body still heaving in anger. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t deal with this. His mind was still trying to wrap around the idea that he even cared about Sid and Willow. The thought of them just falling abruptly out of his life like Caroline did was more then he could take. The guard stood back but kept an unwavering eye on Alec, waiting for the violent outburst he knew was waiting to happen.

TAGGED Willow
WORD COUNT 837
NOTES see? Not as bad.
LYRIC CREDIT 30 seconds to mars
IMAGE CREDIT creatingpulsars @ caution 2.0 and BRIT @ LM

[Willow Joanne Esquire]

She felt teh edge in his voice. She felt the anger. She didn't need to see his features or the fist clenching to know that it was taking every ounce of his self control not to murder her or anybody else on the spot. She flinched when he spoke. Before 'looking' up. Just as it was taking every ounce of his strength not to do anything compleately stupid, it took every ounce of her being not to break down. Not to start screaming and crying, and begging forgiveness. She could barely hold herself together. Ever since she got out of the hospital she was in this state.

She kept 'looking' at his diraction with her pale, scarred eyes, that saw nothing but the darkness. Color seemed to leave her face as she paled his words getting louder and more intence. Reason was on her side now.... but not when she did it. When she did it...what was she thinking? Nothing rational. Those thoughts did not even cross her mind. There were echoes... echoes of memories and conversations. Words... highlighted, flashing over and over in her mind.

She flinched as she heard teh containters and art supplies crash to the ground, and the sound of Alec getting attacked.

Please don't hurt him! It's not his fault! Willow pleaded as she heard the wrestling near her. Times she hated being blind. Unable to see what is going on around you.... who is involved.... what is happening.... Her hands clasped together, fingers intertwining as she presssed them to her chest to keep herself calm. Not an easy task. Then there was silence. Many of hte patients in teh room seemed to have stopped doing what it was they were doing, paying more attention to the scuffle and confrantation in teh previously quiet corner.

Then the steps as Alec walked away.

Carefully, Willow fallowed. Rather clumsily and slowly, trying to avoid running into anything, which... didn't go too smoothly. A nurse tried to stop her, but Willow reasured her that this is just a talk, asking instead to be led to where Alec it. The nurse did so, and took a coule of steps back to give htem privacy.

You're right. I.... I am an idiot. I wasn't thinking at the time.... She paused, extending her arm forward and finding the wall, as she leaned against it. Exhaustion suddenly washing over her. I wasn't thinking of anything at the time... I could only hear my sister's words echoing.....Family.... funny how those who are the closest to you could be the ones that are the ones that can hurt you teh most.... She said.... she said that I caused our family to crumble. That after mom died, dad was... on the edge... then Chris and Amy.... and he couldn't take it. Knowing... knowing that I was like this, was killing him. Killing the rest of the family. Killing Lily. They were afraid. I wanted for it to end. I did'nt want to cause them teh pain.... didn't want them to continue hurting. I did't want to be teh source of that pain and fear.

Her trembling hand rose up as she wiped the tears from her eyes, shaking her head a bit. Her voice was quiet, but sencire. She was just stating things as they are. Trying to work through them.

I know... that... that this was stupid. Compleately and utterly stupid. Unforgivable even. I know. But at that time... I could only hear Christine's voice... echoing over and over in my head. It blocked out any other thought. Any... reasonable thought of the posible consequences. I only realized what I've done after I woke up in the hospital. I... coudln't face Sid... or you... after that. Couldn't bring myself to speak to you guys... It's stupid. It's compleately stupid, and I admit that.... now I admit that. I didn't want to cause you the pain either... that's why I kept away... at least till the wounds heal. Didn't want either of you to worry.... to be hurt.... She dropped her head, listening to what Alec will do or say. If he was going to scream at her... he had the right. She messed up. hell... she wouldn't even stop him if he tried to beat her up. He had the right. She messed up.

[Alec J. Anderson]

Alec was hanging on by a thread and to be honest, he didn’t know how much more it would hold. As much as he wanted to focus on Willow and whatever had caused her to want to end her life, he couldn’t shake the memories that continuously bombarded his thoughts. Caroline had killed herself because she couldn’t bear to live with the knowledge of her rape. He’d felt all of the emotions when she’d died- anger, guilt, denial, sorrow, and finally disconnect. The only emotion he couldn’t shake now was the guilt, the guilt of knowing he should have done more to stop it. Willow’s voice reached him and pulled him from his thoughts, her explanation devouring his disconnect and bringing back the rage he’d held only moments ago.

Alec tried to follow what she was saying but the words seemed hazy to him. At first he thought it was because of her and the way she sounded so exhausted but as he tried harder to listen, he realized it was him. He was trying to listen to her over the sound of his own heart beating in his ears. Her family had said these things to her? A growl ripped from his throat at the thought. How dare they make her feel as if she was to blame for their pain? They should just be able to handle it. But at the same time, wasn’t she the source of his immediate internal anguish? Maybe. But then her and Sid were the only good things in his life right now as well.

“Of course those closest to you are the ones who hurt you. If you didn’t care about them…their actions and words wouldn’t hurt so much.”

His voice, while once harsh and full of rage, seemed melancholy and disconnected. His words had been targeted to her just as much as they had been for her but now he couldn’t even fathom what he’d meant by them. He could hear her crying now, didn’t have to look in her direction. In fact he couldn’t look in her direction because every time he did he felt angry. Alec was mad at everything, yet he felt hallow. The numbing anger took over everything else until he could attempt to process her next set of words. ‘could only hear Christine’s voice…echoing over and over in my head. It blocked out any other thought.’ Alec could relate to that in a lot of ways, but at this particular moment all he could do was look at the window blankly- unmoving. It wasn’t until the last part that the life flooded back into him, wrapped in wrath.

“Cause us pain? Willow… You should have talked to Sid. Or to you doctor. Or someone. You could have even talked to me. I would have tried to help. I could have done something. I…GODDAMMIT. I know that sometimes I’m not the easiest person to talk to. And… I don’t always respond to things well. And sometimes I …get angry about nothing but… I…”

His voice trailed off. The cold hard reality of the situation began to sink in. Alec couldn’t help her. She was going to leave. Sid would leave. Eventually he would be left alone, dealing with everything on his own just as he should have been the whole time. The truth of the matter was Alec hated being alone, loathed the idea of everything leaving him but at the same time, separating himself from others was the only thing he knew how to do. The sudden acknowledgment of his uselessness sucked the emotions from him. Alec couldn’t help her. He couldn’t help anyone. Hell, he couldn’t help himself. It was then he made his decision. Since Alec couldn’t help, he’d leave them alone. Let them suffer on their own and make their own decisions. After all, he’d just make it worse. He made everything worse. His next words came out flat and emotionless.

“Just forget it Willow.”

TAGGED Willow
WORD COUNT 661
NOTES I think you broke him. xD
LYRIC CREDIT 30 seconds to mars
IMAGE CREDIT creatingpulsars @ caution 2.0 and BRIT @ LM

[Willow Joanne Esquire]

(*Gets teh ducktape out... *We can fix him! Ducktape and glue! Does wonders!.... besides, he's a Knight, he's not allowed to be broken. Who'se gonna joust for him?)

She hit a nerve.
She hit many nerves. She didn't mean to, she didn't want to. He was angree now. No.... more then angree. Something else was bothering him, something got his attention. Most likely the sudden urge to kill the young woman. She wipped away some more of her tears.

The growl made her insides cringe. She wanted to hide. To get a time machine and erase this day. Pause time, adn allow all wounds to heal, and have everything to go back to how it was. Better yet... .she wished she would erase teh conversation wtih Christine. If her sister did not come to meet her, none of this would have happened. None of this would be wrong, and they would be happy.

And they are the ones that can bring you the most happyness. Willow echoed bearly audibly, as she wrapped her arms around her, trying to steady her breathing. Funny how now she was the calm and collected and teh rational one, when not all that long ago, she was out of her mind. Funny how those things worked. And how sometimes even teh most lucid mind may become the most warped.

I should have... I should have talked to Sid.. or to you... or to anyone... but I couldn't. I couldn't think properly. There was nothing but teh echoes. Once... once I woke up in teh hospital... I realized what happened. Realized what I've done wrong. But then..... then I could not face you. Was afraid this would happen.... She paused, forcing her voice to be steady. A nearly impossible task, as she was trembling herself, tears sliding down her face, and her insides cringing at the thought of what she caused for Alec...and Sid... should he find out.

I'm sorry... I just.... I don't know what to do. I know I should not have done what I did... I know I should have come to you first.... but... any rational thought... it escaped... and now... now I don't know.... How... how can this be fixed? Willow rested her head against the wall, before hitting it with her fist... cringed slightly from the radiating pain, but over all kept her composure.. if her current state could be so called. Is.... is there anything... that can be done to amend this? Anything? Her voice was despirate, shaking. Afraid. The consequences were starting to sink in.

[Alec J. Anderson]

[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #7a7a7c 10px solid; border-right: #7a7a7c 10px solid; border-top: #a4a2a7 10px solid; border-bottom: #a4a2a7 10px solid; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 10px; padding-left: 10px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] another reason another cause for me to fight another fuse uncovered now for me to light Once more, Alec found he had nothing to say to anyone. And just like before, he felt it would be best if everyone just left him alone in general. He shifted away from Willow, but turned to look at her as she continued speaking. Everything she said seemed hallow to him, empty apologies filled with useless regrets. Or maybe it was just him, maybe something in him had collapsed and sent him into the emotionless void he found himself in now. But nothing about what she was saying caused him to feel anything. He looked on at her as if she were foreign to him, almost as if he failed to understand the rampant emotions in her voice. The tears slipping down her cheeks did nothing to him, only enforcing the fact that he did indeed feel nothing. Alec opened his mouth to speak, but closed it gently as she began talking once more. More apologies and more regrets filled the void between them. ‘how can this be fixed?’ Alec thought for a moment. How could what be fixed? Everything was done. Over. She’d tried to take her own life in a fit of depression and now he was pulling back from them. No more would he attempt to weave his way into their lives as he’d been doing. Yeah, Maybe he knew he wasn’t the best at being friends with someone but now he was pretty sure he was the worst. Someone like him didn’t deserve to have anyone and that’s why they all left. Something was seriously wrong with him and he found he couldn’t care less anymore. Alec blinked as he stared at her, watching blankly as she hit her head with her fist. Still he felt nothing. “There’s nothing to amend. You should just forget about it.” Or stop talking about it, whatever would work best- Alec didn’t really care. A familiar ache reentered his brain, reminding him that the clenching of his fist and tension in his body was doing nothing for the soreness in his shoulders. Alec sighed as he looked away from her back out the window once again. What did she expect him to do? Apologize? Comfort her? He could do neither. If she wanted that kind of attention she was better of hanging around Sid or that idiot Justice. Her issues weren’t Alec’s problem, or that’s how he felt right about now. Hazel eyes slid across the room to look at his guard, still watching him with precarious eyes. His voice was still flat and emotionless, mirroring exactly how he felt. “I should go.” my dedication to all that I've sworn to protect I carry out my orders without a regret tag: Willow words: 433 lyrics: Indestructible - Disturbed template made by © CHELSEA

[Willow Joanne Esquire]

She took a deep breath, shaking her head. No.... he was wrong. He had to be. There had to be something. There had to be something that can be done. Something to... fix things. There was always a solution. There always had to be a solution that could fix things. Sure... not quickly, yes, not to morrow, but eventually... some day.... Seh could not let it be. Yet.... perhaps he was right.

Perhaps they were all right...

Perhaps... they all were right... She frowned slightly. Perhaps, they all had a point. Perhaps tehre was nothing to fix. Perhaps there was nothing to fix. Nothing to try and do. Nothing left.

Everyhting taht could be done had already been done. Everything that could be lost, was already lost. Life.... life was great. Life was not worth it now. Everything passed by, and.... everyone around her ended up hurt. Just like CHristine said. Her father.... Lily... her siblings.... Alec.... Sid... if he finds out.. Everyone around her always got hurt.. killed... Perhaps she should just forget.... give up.... Don't even bother with trying to get to know anyone.... they would get hurt anyways.

You're right....there is no point... Willow echoed, as she dropped her head, pushing herself away from teh wall. There was no point, what so ever. No... she won't give up. She would not give in again. No one would let her die either. Seems as if nothing what ever right. Eveything always ended up wrong. Messed up. She churned around, remembering the diraction from which she came, and whent on back to the painting corner. She'll just paint. Get lost in the memories. Escape this world. This world had nothing in it anyways.

Go rest Lily... take a day off.... see the town... hang out... get some coffee... Willow mumbled quietly, as she shook her head, waving her hand away, to her twin. She wanted to be alone. Perks of being blind. You didn't see anyone. Tune the noices out, all the voices...and you are alone in your own little world. Away from the reality of this place, and teh inevitable downchurns that would be brought with each passing day.

There is no way to appologize... no way to make things better... what came by, passed. C'est la vie.